Here I have collected some questions and answers in regards to repenting for ones sin so that Almighty in His eternal Wisdom may forigve.  Even for such to happen one must do so with sincereity and honesty while stopping oneself from repeating the sins again.

I qoute some Quranic Verses to put things in to perspective.

Surah :: Al Baqarah, Verse :: 269
“He grants wisdom to whom he pleases, and whoever is granted wisdom, he indeed is given a great good and none but men of understanding mind.”

Surah :: Al Nisa, Verses :: 137
- Surely (as for) those who believe then disbelieve, again believe and again disbelieve, then increase disbelief, Allah will not forgive them nor guide them in the (right) path.

Surah :: Al Nisa, Verse :: 148
- Allah does not love the public utterance of hurtful speech unless (it be) by one to whom injustice has been done; and Allah is Hearing, Knowing

Surah :: Al Nisa, Verse :: 149

Sahih International: If [instead] you show [some] good or conceal it or pardon an offense – indeed, Allah is ever Pardoning and Competent.

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QUESTION :: Dear sheikh, as-salamu `alaykum. Is there any way adultery can be forgiven by Allah? I am repenting and crying for forgiveness for having been misled into adultery by someone whom I thought I loved and would leave my husband for. Having come to my senses, I hate myself and my stupidity, and am ashamed. I don’t want my husband to know not now nor in the hereafter. I indulged in it 4 times in all, and all the time persuaded and forced by the man; I have always stayed away from love of sex or thoughts about it because I do not particularly like it, but yet I sinned; please help me cleanse my soul; I fear Allah’s punishment in grave. Jazakum Allahu Khayran.

ANSWER ::

Allah says in the Qur’an: [Say: 'O my Servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah: for Allah forgives all sins: for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.'] (Az-Zumar 39: 53) [Allah accepts the repentance of those who do evil in ignorance and repent soon afterwards; to them will Allah turn in mercy: For Allah is full of knowledge and wisdom.](An-Nisaa’ 4: 17)
In his response to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:

I commend you for your deep feeling of remorse for committing such a heinous act; now that you have been guilty of this most heinous sin, it is imperative that you immediately take the steps towards cleansing yourself through sincere repentance.
First step in repentance is to recognize the gravity of the sin you have committed. You have soiled the marriage bed; you have formed an illicit liaison with a man while married to another; you have been guilty of marital infidelity. You have committed acts that are threatened with dire consequences in the Qur’an and the Sunnah. You are therefore guilty of a most heinous sin; they could cause you eternal perdition unless you cleanse yourself through repentance and good works.
So never take your sins lightly; fill your heart with deep remorse; never even look back or cherish such sins; rather cry over your sins. Cut of all associations with the man immediately; and never have any contacts with him; erase him from your memory; he is indeed a wolf preying on the vulnerable. He is not your friend; he is, as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, someone who feasts on the rotten meat while shunning the lawful wife that Allah has permitted for him.
Here are the steps you need to take immediately:
1. Feel deep remorse and sorrow for the most heinous acts you have committed; visualize the gravity of such sins and their enormity always; if you ever happen to think of them, rush to beg for the mercy and forgiveness of Allah through istighfar.
2. Now that Allah has covered you, you ought to thank Him for giving you a chance to seek repentance. Remember that Allah will only give you so much chance; if you were to persist in such sins, He will expose you, thus you will end up  being despised and forsaken by Him as well as by the people.
3. Cut of all associations with the man or any other man for that matter; also refrain from every single association or lead or temptation that may expose you directly or indirectly to adultery/fornication including watching movies, shows with vulgar and lewd scenes or reading literature with such themes, listening to such music, etc.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) taught us that adultery has many forms and shapes: “Eyes commit adultery; ears commit adultery, tongues commit adultery, hands commit adultery, the feet and legs commit adultery: It is finally consummated is by the private parts.“ So you ought to shun not only the final act itself, but all of the steps towards it in every possible way as well.
4. Resolve firmly in your mind never to commit such acts.
5. Even as you stay away from adultery, it is imperative that you do good works to redeem yourself and wipe out your past misdeeds. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Allah will not wipe out bad deeds with bad deeds; He rather wipes them out through good deeds.” Allah says, (Verily good deeds wipe out bad deeds) (Hud 11: 114). So occupy your self and mind with whatever good works you can possibly do.
6. It is equally important for you to join other sisters who are occupied with good works; make friends with them, and join them in such works such as hospital visitation; volunteering for the community in food banks, etc.
7. Be diligent in your Prayers, including sunan (strongly recommended prayers) and nawafil (optional ones), for Prayers, when performed in true form and spirit, will help us all to restrain ourselves from sins and evil deeds. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) taught us praying five times a day is like bathing oneself five times a day in fresh stream of water. In other words, just as bathing helps us rid ourselves of your physical dirt and filth, Prayer helps rid ourselves of our spiritual filth.
9. Be constant in dhikr (remembrance of Allah) and istighfaar (saying astaghfiruAllah); here is a du`aa‘ (supplication) you should read as you wake up in the morning and as you retire to bed. You may also read it in solitude while praying nafl; while reading thisdu`aa‘; you may do well to induce tears, preferably in sujud.

Allaahumma anta rabbee laa ilaaha illaa anta khalaqtanee wa ana amatuka wa ana `alaa `ahdika wa wa`dika ma’istata`tu,a`oosdhu bika min sharri maa sana`tu aboo’u laka bi ni`matika `alayya wa aboo’u bi dhanbee fa ighfir lee fa innahu laa yaghfiruadh-dhunooba illaa anta
(O Allah, You are my Lord, there is no god but You; You have created me and I am your servant; I stand firmly by my covenant with You to the best of my ability; I seek refuge in You from the evils of my own actions; I acknowledge Your favors upon me; I confess to You my sins; so forgive me, for only You have the power to forgive sins.)
Now coming to the point of telling your husband or anyone of this, my advice is that since Allah has covered your sin, you should never lift that cover. But you must develop and foster your love for your husband, and do your best to please him. Having said this, however, I must caution you about one issue: If you have any reason to suspect that you have contracted any sexually transmitted disease, then you must definitely divulge the matter to your husband immediately so that he is saved and spared of the agony of suffering the dire consequences of your reckless acts.
I pray that Allah forgives you of your heinous sins. Never fail to beg Allah constantly for His mercy and forgiveness, and never again think of committing such acts.

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QUESTION :: Dear Sheikkh, As-Salamu `alaykum. I am currently undergoing a spiritual change and I have discovered a closeness to Allah. I am reading the Qur’an and I have stopped my past destructive behavior. There is one problem: I feel that because of the sins I have committed in my past through so much ignorance, I will be punished by Allah in the Hereafter. This fear haunts me everyday. What must I do? Jazakum Allah khayran.

ANSWER ::

Answering your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:

“Your question is indicative of your remorse and sorrow for your past sins. The fact that you feel sorry for your past sins and you have embarked on a path of repentance is indeed a most happy sign. You should know that Islam is a religion of hope; it teaches us that Allah is All-Compassionate and All-Merciful. Allah has declared that His mercy is waiting to embrace those sinners who have decided to repent. Once they repent, no matter how ugly their sins are, Allah, the Most Exalted and Glorious, says: “Do they not know that it is Allah Who accepts the repentance of His servants and receives (approves) their charity, and that Allah is the Relenting, the Compassionate?” (At-Tawbah: 104)
“Say: ‘O My servants who wronged against their souls, do not despair of Allah’s mercy! For Allah forgives all sins; for He is indeed Forgiving, Compassionate.” (Az-Zumar: 53)

Thus if you are guilty of sins involving the rights of Allah, then ask forgiveness of Allah by doing the following: first, feel deeply remorseful for your sins; second, refrain from the sins and all their associations and leads; third, resolve firmly in your mind never to sin again; and finally, be occupied in whatever good works you can do to expiate for your past sins.

All of the above involve sins involving the rights of Allah. If, however, your sins involve the rights of human beings, then you must also do whatever it takes to return, compensate or redress the grievances of the person or persons you have wronged by paying them their dues or compensating them in whatever ways possible.

Having done this, it is important for you in your present condition to focus on the future and dwell on the mercy of Allah rather than living in the past. It is equally important for you to recognize the fact that just as Satan led you astray from the straight path by prompting you to sin in the past, he is now actively working to dissuade you from repentance by making you think all bad thoughts about Allah. The snares and traps of Satan are indeed most beguiling and subtle. Allah says: “O Children of Adam! Let not the Devil seduce you as he caused your (first two) parents to leave the Garden and tore off from them their robe (of innocence) that he might manifest their shame to them. He sees you, he and his tribe, from whence you see them not. Indeed, We have made the devils the allies of those who do not believe.” (Al-A`raf: 27)

Satan is therefore diligently working to pull you away from the straight path. So you must be on guard against him. He is now playing the card of fear of Allah to make you perish. Remember the Deceiver plays different cards with different types of people; with the sinners he uses the card of divine mercy; with the penitent he uses the card of fear of divine wrath.

So never allow yourself to be beguiled and trapped by Satan and his troops. Try to remain steadfast in repentance, and be assured of divine mercy and forgiveness.

You should be consistent in istighfar (seeking Allah’s forgiveness) and asking Allah to make you remain on the path of repentance:

Here are a few Prophetic supplications you should use on a regular basis:

Allahumma anta rabbi, la ilaha illa anta. Khalaqtani wa ana `abduka, wa ana `ala `ahdika wa wa`dika ma istata`tu. A`udhu bika min sharri ma sana`tu. Abu’u laka bi ni`matika `alayya wa abu’u bi dhanbi, fa ighfir li, fa innahu la yaghfiru adh-dhunuba illa anta.

(O Allah! You are my Lord, there is no god but You. You created me and I am Your servant, I stand by my covenant and promise with You according to the best of my ability. I seek refuge in You from the evils of my own actions. I acknowledge Your favors upon me, I confess my sins to You, so forgive me, for none can forgive sins except You.)

Allahumma inni as’aluka ath-thabata fi al-amri wa al-`azimata `ala ar-rushdi; wa as’aluka shukra ni`matika wa husna `ibadatika; wa as’aluka qalban saliman wa lisanan sadiqan; wa as’aluka min khayri ma ta`lamu; wa a`udhu bika min sharri ma ta`lamu; wa astaghfiruka lima ta`lamu; innaka anta `allamu al-ghuyub.

(O Allah! I ask you to grant me steadfastness and consistency in all my affairs; make me resolute on the path of rectitude; I beseech You to inspire me to be grateful for Your favors, to worship You well; I beseech You to grant me a pure heart and a truthful tongue; I beg You for all the goodness that You know of; and I seek refuge in You from all the evils that You know of; I ask forgiveness of You from all that You know of; verily, You are the Knower of all the secrets and hidden mysteries.)”

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QUESTION ::  Dear scholars, As-Salamu `alaykum. I am a Muslimah who has committed many sins, due to sheer weakness. I have even been tricked in one instance which led to a sin so bad, I realized I had to change my ways. Do you think Allah will forgive me. Truly speaking I am feeling ashamed of myself, but I don’t know what to do. I don’t feel that asking for forgiveness is enough. So please respond to me telling me how to repent and what to do to be forgiven. Jazakum Allah khayran.

ANSWER ::

Reading your question, our dear sister, gives the reflection that you are along the path of repentance and we implore Allah to accept your repentance and to reward you generously. Whatever sins one might have done are nothing compared to Allah’s encompassing mercy. The door to repentance is wide open, and Allah showers His sinful servants who turn penitent to Him, with His Forgiveness.

It is never too late for a true Muslim to repent to Allah, and to shed tears for the wrong doing he has committed, keeping in mind that if one manages to escape the punishment of mortals, he will not for sure escape the punishment of Allah in the Hereafter. So, it is better to start a new leaf and let bygones be bygones. As long as you are sincere in your repentance, Allah Almighty will accept your repentance and forgive you your sins.

Elaborating on the importance of repentance and how it should be done, we’d like to cite for you the fatwa issued by Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and an Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, in this regard:

“ If you committed evil but have repented sincerely, and changed your life around for better, then Allah has certainly promised to grant you mercy and forgiveness. It is one of the basic principles of belief in Islam that Allah is All-Relenting, All-Forgiving and All-Merciful.

Here are a few verses which clearly convey this crucial concept:

“Do they not know that it is Allah Who accepts the repentance of His servants and receives (approves) their charity, and that Allah is the Relenting, the Compassionate?” (At-Tawbah: 104)

“Say: ‘O My servants who wronged against their souls, do not despair of Allah’s mercy! For Allah forgives all sins; for He is indeed Forgiving, Compassionate.’” (Az-Zumar: 53)

So do not put off repentance; take the necessary steps immediately, for no one can tell when the death will overtake us. The door of repentance is open so long as we are not in the throes of death, for the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Allah accepts the repentance of His servant so long as death has not reached his collar bone.” But since we have no way of knowing when death will overtake us, we must never be complacent or slack in hastening to taking steps towards repentance.

While speaking of repentance, I must rush to add, that it cannot be considered as valid unless one takes the following steps:

Firstly, one must feel deep remorse for the sins one has committed.

Secondly, one must refrain from it totally while also abstaining from all those leads or circumstances that led him to such a sin in the first place.

Thirdly, he must be firmly resolved never to sin again, and immediately becoming occupied in whatever good deeds that he can in order to wipe out his past sins.

Fourthly, all of the above involve sins involving the rights of Allah; if, however, your sins involve the rights of human beings, then you must also do whatever it takes to return or compensate or redress the grievances of the person you have wronged. Paying him his dues or compensating him in whatever ways possible becomes an essential condition of valid repentance.

Repentance, as stated above once accomplished, will undoubtedly wipe out one’s sins, and guarantee him a clean record. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “One who has repented of a sin (sincerely) is like one who has never sinned at all.””

Excerpted, with slight modifications, from: www.muslims.ca

In conclusion, after sinning, one should not feel despair. Rather one should forward sincere repentance to Allah and rest assured that Allah Almighty will forgive his sin, as long as his repentance meets the abovementioned conditions of sincerity. Moreover, you must learn how to forget, for the more you look back to your old days of sinful habit, the wider the door is open for Satan to draw you back. Scholars used to resemble this case to that of gazelle being chased by hound. Despite that gazelle is naturally faster in speed, but its frequent looking back weakens its morale and makes it an easy prey for hounds.

So dear sister, don’t follow the suit of that poor gazelle; try to look forward, with full hope in the overflowing mercy of Allah, and rest assured that as long as you are true with Allah, He will be very kind with you, for surely He is full of love, especially to His penitent servants. May Allah guide you to the straight path and direct you to that which pleases Him, Ameen.

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QUESTION :: Dear scholars, As-Salamu `alaykum. I understand that all the sins fall under two categories, minor and major. Is the method of repentance the same for both types of sins? Also, what if you happened to commit a sin but you did not know that the sin is considered major in Islam? For example, hugging a member of opposite sex falls under zina but the person did not know that before; is it considered just as severe? I would appreciate if you would provide me with the answers to these questions. Jazakum Allah khayran.

ANSWER ::

In his response to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:

“Since Allah’s laws are solely intended to save humanity from the destructive nature of the evil inclinations inherent in our souls, He has declared certain acts as enormous sins because of their extremely disastrous consequences and effects on individuals and societies. The greater the consequences, the greater their enormity and gravity. Allah teaches us in the Qur’an that the previous nations were destroyed due to their persistence in sins and their failure to heed the call of the Messengers to repent and amend their ways. We are also told in no unmistakable terms that we stand to gain happiness and prosperity in both worlds by shunning sins altogether and following the right way.

Thus sins are termed as major or minor essentially because of their gravity or enormity in terms of their consequences or effects on individuals and society. Accordingly, some sins are considered most heinous, abominable; they incur divine wrath or punishment or curse or serious consequences. Among the most obvious examples of such sins are: shirk (associating partners with Allah), displeasing one’s parents, murder, bearing false testimony, adultery or fornication, practicing black magic, devouring riba (interest), devouring an orphan’s wealth, robbing others, etc.

The minor sins, on the other hand, are those which do not fall in the above category. They are minor in so far as they do not incur any of the above serious consequences.

All major sins require tawbah or sincere repentance. Sincere repentance involves four steps: The first is for a person to be deeply remorseful of the sin; secondly, to refrain from it and all of the circumstances that led to it; thirdly, to make a firm resolution never to do it again; and finally, to follow it up by whatever good deeds one can possibly do. Allah says, “Verily good deeds wipe out bad deeds.” (Hud: 114). The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) further explains this by saying: “Allah does not wipe out bad deeds through bad deeds; rather He blots them out through good deeds.”

As for the minor sins such as flirting or hugging, or touching a member of the opposite sex, et cetera, if they are not habitual actions, they are considered minor sins, and they can be wiped out by repentance, istighfar(asking Allah for forgiveness) and good works. Once a person came to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and presented himself saying, “I happened to see a woman on my way and got everything from her except sexual intercourse.” The Prophet told him that he had been forgiven because of his prayer with him (with sincere feeling of repentance and remorse). The lesson to learn from this story is that such sins may be forgiven by good works followed by feelings of remorse and penitence.

Having said this, however, we must remember the important point stated by Imam Ghazali: Persistence in minor sins will turn them into major ones. Thus a person who is committing such acts and persisting in them is guilty of major sins as opposed to someone who is guilty of occasional lapses. Therefore, the only way to repent in such case is to quit such habits cold turkey and also cut oneself off totally and entirely from all associations or circumstances that led him to such sins. He/she cannot hope to change for the better without such serious measures.

If, instead, one were to persist in them, he/she would end up losing the purity of heart, the moral conscience. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) warned us against the pervasive effects of sins on our souls. He said that when a person commits a sin, it falls like a black dot on the clean slate of his heart. If he repents, the dot is erased. If, however, he persists in the same and continues to sin, the dot will continue to expand until it covers his entire heart, in which case his spiritual soul becomes completely sealed off. As a result he fails to recognize good as good and evil as evil. The Prophet said this is what Allah has repeatedly warned us against in the Qur’an: “Nay, their hearts have been sealed by the sins they have accumulated.” (Al-Mutaffifeen: 14).

To conclude: We must always exercise extreme vigilance and caution against all types of sins, both major and minor. We must develop the habit of repenting in the prescribed manner and expiate for our sins by consistently engaging in good works as best as we can. May Allah help us all to protect the purity of our hearts, and may He grant us forgiveness and mercy. Ameen.”

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QUESTION :: Dear scholars, As-Salamu `alaykum. I have commited certain sins in my past, and I have begged Allah for forgiveness. And I have no intentions of ever doing them again (may Allah give me the strength). But the problem is that the past still haunts me and I get very anxious sometimes. Can you help me out by telling me something that is reassuring? I dont expect you to give me a solution, but a little support would be helpful. Thanking you in anticipation.

ANSWER ::

Dearest sister, your question definitely shows your sense of guilt and your desire to improve yourself; this definitely is a step in the right direction. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Feeling true sense of remorse is (a step toward) repentance.”

After sinning, one should not feel despair. Rather one should forward sincere repentance to Allah and rest assured that Allah Almighty will forgive his sin, as long as his repentance is sincere. Try to look forward, with full hope in the overflowing mercy of Allah, and rest assured that as long as you are true with Allah, He will be very kind with you, for surely He is full of love, especially to His penitent servants.

Elaborating on this issue, we’d like to cite for you the fatwa issued by Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and an Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, in this regard:

In order to better appreciate the Islamic view on this issue, let me state the following:

1. As human beings we may fall into sins, in spite of our best efforts. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “All human beings are liable to commit sins, but the best of them are those who repent and return to Allah.”

2. Repentance, however, is not simply feeling sorry or uttering some words; rather it consists of turning our life around for the better. In other words, we cannot be true and sincere in our repentance unless we have taken the following steps: Shun the sin altogether; feel deep sorrow and remorse for the sin we have committed, resolve never to do it again, and finally, follow it up by good deeds.

3. Once we have followed through the above requirements, we must never look back.

4. In order to make sure that we remain always in a state of confession and clear conscience, readsayyidal-istighfar (listed below) both in the morning and at night, before retiring to bed.

Allaahummaanta rabbi la ilaha illa anta khalqtani wa ana `abduka wa ana `ala `ahdika wa wa`dikamastata`tu a`udhu bika min sharri ma sana`tu abu’u laka bi ni`matika `alayya wa abu’u bi dhanbifaghfir li fa innahu la yaghfiru adh-dhunuba illa anta

( O Allah, You are my Lord; there is no god but You; You have created me, and I am Your servant; I stand by my covenant with you as best as I can; I seek refuge in You from the evils of my actions; I acknowledge Your favors upon me, and I confess my sins to You, so forgive me, for You alone can forgive sins.) The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said if a person were to read the abovedu`a’ sincerely in the morning, and if he were to die during the day he would enter Paradise; likewise, if he were to read it before retiring to bed and he were to die during the night, he would enter Paradise.

5. Once we do our part, we must never despair of Allah’s mercy. Allah says, “…surely none despairs of Allah’s mercy except the unbelieving people.” (Yusuf: 87)

6. Reading and reflecting on the following verse is bound to rekindle your spirit of hope. “O My Servants, who have wronged their souls, do not despair of Allah’s mercy! For Allah forgives all sins; for He is indeed Forgiving, Compassionate. Turn to your Lord in repentance, and submit to Him, before the torment overtakes you when you shall not be helped.” (Az-Zumar: 53-54)